“Do you know what I mean?” is a question we ask others every day. This question reflects the importance of critical listening skills in workplace interactions, customer service situations, even everyday conversations with your spouse or other family members. In this time of so many choices, informed decisions are more important than ever. Whether they are a salesperson, coworker or significant other, using critical listening while discussing things with them helps you develop a better set of critical listening skills.

Everyone wants to have their voice heard. It could be your coworker who may have some applicable knowledge or feedback on a project, the salesman advocating the benefit of his product over comparable items or your fiance working to help plan your wedding. One of the most important benefits of critical listening is that it helps you to determine what is the important information and discard that which is insignificant. Active listening also provides the speaker with the assurance that you care about them or the subject at hand.

In today’s world, it is becoming increasingly clear that the competitive style of the workplace has not always produced the best results. Due to this, many companies have integrated a more cooperative approach to problem-solving. There is a give and take involved in this and every party should be fully engaged with the contributions of all of its members. This is where critical listening becomes very important to getting tasks accomplished while also making sure that there are fewer misunderstandings.

What Is Critical Listening?

There are several key elements to critical listening. Here are some of the most important things we can do to become better critical listeners.

Think About the Source and the Context in Which the Message Is Being Sent

Always assess what each person is hoping to gain in an interaction. Consider the persuasive qualities of the speaker as well. Is someone trying to convince you to use their methods on a project? Are they selling you a car? Hoping to win an argument or resolve an ongoing problem? There are always positives and negatives to any approach, purchase or opinion about a personal relationship.

Weigh all of these issues carefully before approaching the other party to try to reach a solution. If a person is talking up one specific product and then you discover they are a major distributor of that product, be wary of their motivations in their interactions with you.

Think about Whether the Speaker Has Provided Support for Their Ideas

Ask additional questions about the ideas the speaker has set forth and their validity. If there are many more sources that question the validity of their points than those that support it, this should raise a red flag and you may need to assess the situation more critically. This enables you to make sure that you are working from legitimate sources of information rather than just gossip. A good example of this would be the number of scientists who support the idea of climate change versus the few that do not support it.

Listen for Clues As to the Speaker Having Firsthand Experience with the Topic They Are Addressing

If the claims being made are those of someone else who has experience with the product, the speaker may not be as reliable in their representation of the product or idea. We see commercials every day in which the consumer is played by an actor who is there to earn a paycheck. You should always weigh the legitimacy of the claims and the person who is making them when considering any information given to you.

Why Is It Important?

We live in an information age. How informed we are makes a big difference in every aspect of our lives. Weighing options on a purchase is an excellent example. If you are buying a car, you should always check its market price and mileage to be sure you are getting a good deal. With a home, you might weigh the options of repairs on a fixer upper versus buying something new. It is also important to learn critical listening for use in your personal relationships. If your significant other seems to be troubled by something while stating that everything is alright, pay attention to their tone and dig deeper if their body language implies that the opposite is true.

Additionally, critical listening is important due to the changes in the ways in which we communicate in these modern times. So much of our communication is done by email, which tends to depersonalize the human aspect of the interaction. When you use some of the tips below to make the speaker feel heard, you are establishing a line of communication and personal connection that could benefit both of you in the future. We tend to listen more to people who listen to us.

Critical listening will only grow in importance as we see a more and more diversified workforce. Being a critical listener can help you detect unintentional bias on the part of the speaker regarding race, gender and ethnic or cultural background. There are three ways in which this bias is usually manifested. They sometimes overlap and impair the ability to listen to ideas and effectively analyze them.

Fixing the Person or Group

The speaker might try to ‘fix’ the person or group who think or speak differently, to ensure their compliance with normative behaviors. The perception that Asian employees need to speak up more often, or that women should be more aggressive in their business practices are examples of this bias.

Stereotyping or Essentialism

The person or group is generalized about without acknowledgment of the differences of individuals within the group. We tend to think of women as timid and passive, but that is not at all true, as evidenced by the growing number of women who are CEOs of companies. This is a more recent development that has only taken place since men stopped viewing all women through this lens. The perception that marketing to African Americans must include some hip-hop element to appeal to them is an excellent example of stereotyping an entire race, since many African Americans do not even listen to hip-hop.

Framing of the Group

This is most often used with women, but also happens with people of color. Since women have been generally forced to play the primary caregiver in the lives of all of those around them, we consistently hear the argument that women need flexibility when they have children or that they want a workplace to be family friendly. This does not take into account that there are plenty of females in the workplace who do not have or want children. It also allows the traditional roles to be maintained and reinforced without men having to question their familial and gender roles.

Tips on Becoming a Better Critical Listener

It is not that difficult to become better critical listeners once we set our minds to it. The ten tips below will help you develop the tools to sharpen your critical listening skills.

• Approach the speaker with an open mind
• Maintain eye contact while speaking and listening
• Be attentive to the person with whom you are speaking
• Visualize the story that the speaker is telling you and pay attention to the nonverbal cues they are giving you
• Pay attention to the speaker’s tone and put yourself in their shoes
• Wait for a pause in the conversation before you start asking questions
• Make sure the questions you ask further your understanding of the topic
• Stay on track with the subject being discussed; avoid meandering
• Provide feedback to let the speaker know you are listening
• Don’t try to ‘solve’ the problem for the other person

Conclusion

The importance of critical listening in modern society is something that should not be dismissed. In a time of so much misinformation, it is important to question the information you are given. There are a variety of things to consider when receiving information, such as context, source, proof to support ideas and firsthand knowledge. Are you in a sales environment? Do you trust the person and have they given you correct information in your past interactions? Have they provided you with the findings of others to further reinforce their conclusions or opinions? Have they directly experienced the product, event, or possible outcomes of similar decisions?

We must also remember to show respect to the other party, including maintaining eye contact when culturally appropriate and being attentive while they are speaking. Empathy is a huge part of the critical listening process. It is important that you are fully aware of the tone, nonverbal cues and perspective of the speaker as you listen to their words, since these can often show when their words are not in alignment with the cues they are giving to you. In a day and age where it seems that everyone is talking and that there are just too many words, it is often most productive to critically listen to other people.